Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Sunday, September 22, 2013

#sept19th2006

Hi friends,

To many people, September 19th might hold no significance. It might be a friend or loved one's birthday(s); it might be the day that he/she starts a new job or new school year; or it could be the day that you have lost someone. For me personally, September 19th 2006 has quite a big impact on my life. I once again was hit by vulnerability. Now I have learned to admit that we can be vulnerable every now and then and it will be okay. But I can never forgot the emotional distress that I went through that night.

September 19th 2006. That was the night that the latest coup d'etat in Thailand took place. I remember getting a call from my mom, telling me that a military coup d'etat will take place tonight. Dad won't be coming home tonight. He is on the way to my uncle's. One could imagine how shocked a seventeen years old can be in a situation like that. Back then my dad held in a position in the government, and of course that means if this situation turns bad.. it might potentially be bad for him as well.

I rushed to watch the news on the tv in my parent's bedroom. The waiting was painful, really. Then when the situation rolled out, it was too fast to even comprehend. First our former PM announced a emergency decree through skype from NY since he was there to participate in UN General Assembly. All of the sudden it was cut off half way, and all I can hear was "Beeeeeepppppp....". This is probably most of how all of the other people felt. Confused. I was very much confused, and what was worse was that we were informed that dad didn't go to my uncle's but chose to go back to the gov't house instead. Panic, confusion, fear, as much as a seventeen years old could feel.

I really hates politics.


There was no news.. everyone media was cut off. My imagination ran wild. Will my dad be put to prison? What will happened? Nobody can tell me anything. I cried.. and my brother cried.. (which our parents made fun of us later on.. grr such meanies!). How are we supposed to react in this situation. I know I felt vulnerable, I was so scared and I was helpless.

Next morning, we were told that our dad was held on a house arrest at one of the military base nearby. Only families are allowed to visit. Grandma was there at our place in the morning. She, also, was in distress. I think not knowing what was going to happen was the scariest part. She thought she has lost her son(s) once, and now.. who knew what was going to happen. We went and visit dad. Everything was so controlled. Mom told dad about us crying. Dad laughed (mehh!!! I still pouted about it). Anyhow, seeing him in safe and sound condition was assuring me.

The aftermath was somewhat of a blur. A military was running the government for a while. Dad was home everyday for a next few weeks (yes, that is not so common). Phones tapped (OH YES, this is not a conspiracy theory, it was proven. Mid way through the conversation when it started to be more serious about politics, it was cut off.. Yes, we are not overthinking it). Discussion of relocation pops up in our family dinner. Visiting Hong Kong, Australia, and all that. Luckily, none of that really ever happens. Though I always remembers what dad always says, "What am I going to do elsewhere and retired? Working in McDonald for minimum wages?" Yes, I think it would be hilarious to see him work in a McDonald.


I would never forgot that night and how it has shaped me. The decision that dad took to head back to the govt house rather than to run away. The ignorance of other people in my generation about this political changes. Oh, how it shook me. Oh, how it inspired me.

Seven years passed. Every now and then what I think about I can still feel those emotions running through me, tears and fear.


Best,
Emily

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Things I'm grateful for..

My dear friends, 

This is a much.. overdue post. To be honest, part of my new year resolutions was to do at least one post per month, and yet.. here we are, 6 months later. But I am here to tell you a quick brief updates about my life. It has been a little difficult and stressful lately. Nevertheless I would like to devote this post to tell you guys about things I am grateful for. 

Over this past 6 months, there were times when I was idle and bored (yes, out of my mind). And, there were times that I was overwhelmed (yes, again out of my mind). But here now thinking back to those times, I really a lot of people. I mentioned in the last posts that I don't want to take things for granted, and I wish to do this reflection every once in a while, to be a better person and to grow a bit by bit from the self-reflection. 

And since I love making list.. (here we go again, another damn list!)

1. A couple of things that I signed up for earlier this year when I was feeling rather idle were: (i)  volunteering with the "School-Company-Parents (SCP)" with Young entrepreneurs Development Councils (YDC), and (ii) my Putonghua class (woot, woot! 我是中文棵的学生! ). Both of them are going great at the moment, but the things that I would like to mention here is the SCP program. Since I moved to Hong Kong, due to language limitations, I have also limited my opportunity to volunteer locally. Through this program, however, I managed to work through those language barrier and get involved again. These guys here are the kids that I worked with. Teaching them about "Career Choice" makes me reflect upon my own. Thinking about why I have chosen to study Economics and Biology, and also how I ended up here in Hong Kong, and most importantly being able to guide someone with that experience are quite rewarding. These guys remind me of how much how much I have grown.


Note: SCP Program is started with YDC organization and technically we were to guide these secondary school kids to face the business world and the reality of job hunting and career planning. 


2. I've also got a chance to travel a bit. Explore unknown space. Though I am not going to discuss much about this because we all know what I am talking about (Explore, explore, explore, and never say no to an adventure!), I've learned that we can always do the smallest things like explore a park on a rainy day, watching the sunset and eating cold cakes. Yes, that makes the best memories. Indeed, the best.


3. My dearest. He gave me so much support. I ranted and ranted everyday, mood swings and all those emo moments. He was there. Supporting me and making me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Really, I do feel that way sometimes! I am forever grateful. I really hope I am the same to you. You keep me silly. You are keeping my young.



4. Family. When I am at my saddest moments, I long for them. And I have not felt this way in a long time. Yes, there are times that I am homesick. But I am been on my own for so long that I forgot what it is like to feel like you can depends on someone.  They give me so much more than I thought I am receiving. Simplest words. would lift me up. I miss them so. I really do.


5. Sigur Ros and cute puppies (yes, cute puppies).

Sigur ros first.. Their musics, their epic concert. (not so much the ticket price, but hey, it is Sigur Ros afterall). I finally got the chance to go see them live. Jonsi again did not disappoint. Went to their concert at Asia-World Expo on May 21 (long-awaited since the beginning of the year!) Listening to them live reminds me so much of why I am so attracted to their music. Ah.. 2009 till now, I am very happy I have learned about them.


Secondly, puppies. I can not not give them credits, for I am very much grateful for their cuteness! These babies lift up my spirits a lot. When I'm down, when I'm bored, when I'm stressed. But look at those puppies, they make me smile big every single time. soo cute! 


6. Coursera.org This online class platform has helped to remind me of how much I am learned from moving here in Hong Kong. It's not just about learning new things, I realized how much I can contribute and that, honestly, build up my self-esteem again. Currently I am taking Professor Henry Perry's class on Health for All through Primary Healthcare with John Hopkins! My first public health related class after undergrad career! Let's see where this class lead me!

So that were the lists of things that I am recently very grateful of. Of course, a lot of it has sounds quite depressing. I have to admit that over the pass few weeks, I was unhappy and stressed and therefore, these things are quite crucial and more significant to me that you might understand. Anyhow, I hope again to update the blog more regularly since this proposal preparation madness! Of course... after I catch up with my putonghua class, my online class, the traveling scrapbook, and a lot of other things... hehe I am a busy girl ;).

Don't forget to stay silly!


Till next time,
Emily